Notice that stench? It's not from all those dirty diapers in "Life as We Know It." It's the smell of laziness emanating from yet another assembly-line Katherine Heigl rom-com.
As these films go, "Life as We Know It" is cute and cuddly in moments. But for the most part this ode to mismatched love with a baby tossed in goes down like Pablum. You pray for some texture and flavour, but all you're left with is reheated mush.
Heigl and co-star Josh Duhamel do their damnedest with this weak, sentimental tale about a prissy, controlling caterer (what else?) and a womanizing TV director (big surprise!) who become co-guardians to a one-year-old baby girl.
And you guessed it: A predictable, "pre-baby" history accompanies their heart-tugging dilemma.
Set up a on a blind date by baby Sophie's parents, Holly Berenson (Heigl) and Eric Messer (Duhamel) hate each other from the get-go.
Messer arrives for their date an hour late. He opens his phone and arranges a rendezvous with another hottie in Holly's presence.
Holly's contempt for this skunk flies from the ends of her perfectly coiffed hair. Messer just wants to move on to the next easy conquest.
But fate has other plans in mind after Sophie's parents die in a car accident and the child is left in these enemies' care.
Good chemistry, bad story
Heigl and Duhamel do share some good on-screen chemistry at times. Heigl, a producer on the film, also fought to hire the "Transformers" star.
For that, and a slight attempt at flexing more acting muscles, Heigl deserves some acknowledgement.
But aside from those few moments when Holly and Messer do connect, this clunker from screenwriters Ian Deitchman and Kristin Rusk Robinson isn't easy to stomach.
The sad thing about "Life as We Know It" is that with a decent, original script it could have said something meaningful about the makings of family in our modern world.
We've moved long past traditional family units, to the joy of some and to the everlasting chagrin of others. But director Greg Berlanti reduces this story to baby poop jokes and "I hate you, I love you" banter.
I wish it had been more and I'll tell you why.
A few years ago a good friend asked me if I would become involved in their child's life should anything happen to her or her husband.
Raising the child, or adopting it, was never put on the table. If it had I would have fainted from fright and the overwhelming responsibility.
But that event made me wonder what would happen if the death of two very dear friends occurred.
Most people would cry at such a tragedy. They'd rage against everything they believed in to explain why this could happen.
That emotional reality is missing in "Life as We Know It."
These two sparring partners walk into Sophie's Atlanta mansion concerned more about the décor and coordinating their dating schedules than life as they need to know it.
I know this is a comedy. But tragedy can breed surprisingly good laughs -- ask anyone who has been to a funeral. It's the way the human heart works.
The makers of "Life as We Know It" should have remembered that. They should have also taken a good look at "Bringing Up Baby," Howard Hawks' 1938 classic about mismatched love.
Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant are tossed together by fate when they are forced to retrieve a cuddly pet leopard called "Baby."
"Life as We Know It" could never in a million years match the breezy, rom-com brilliance of "Bringing Up Baby." But I almost wish they'd thrown in that damned leopard just to help this stinker out.
One and a half stars out of four.
